2014 reflection and 6 lessons for my Son

I haven't written in quite a while, partly due to time constraints and partly due to searching for the next bit of inspiration to keep it up. We welcomed our first child, a baby boy, Jack, on June 1, 2014 at 9:54 pm and my life has been turned upside down ever since. Needless to say, triathlon took a back burner along with sleep and coherence. In an effort to double-down on our stress levels, we decided to sell our home in the Heights and took on the management of building a home in the suburbs. Jack arrived two weeks after we moved in. I have never felt more loyalty and love for anything in my entire life; it is a feeling indescribable by words.

I started this blog to tell my story in order to motivate others by using triathlon as a metaphor, and as such, would like to continue that trend. This post will attempt to recount the 2014 triathlon season, take all of the things I learned and form them into lessons for Jack. Here goes nothing:

The older you get, the more things hurt. I began 2014 with a new hip and groin after having them surgically repaired in Oct 2013. The orthopedic surgeon suggested that years of abuse from playing football, running with poor form and not stretching had torn the group of ligaments that attached my quadricep muscle to my hip joint. My lesson to you: God gave you one set of tools for being active. Take care of them because the repaired version is never as good as the original. Choose your activity level wisely. And stretch.

Major decisions need time. Your mother and I are very good at many things. Making life changing decisions is not one of them (we're trying to get better). I can attribute the majority of the mistakes I've made in my life to being impatient. I've left jobs for what I thought was something better, more distinguished, only to find it was too soon. I've moved, thinking new scenery would provide a new set of opportunities. I've overspent on vehicles and homes. I've taken off too fast on the swim to find later that my heart rate was too high causing my bike and run to suffer. My lesson to you: Try to understand the phrase "Rome wasn't built in a day." Before you write a check and sign a legal document, sleep on it. Take a weekend to reflect on it. Write down the pros and cons. Run the numbers. Repeat.

Adversity is a good thing. My best friend and training partner accepted a new job in June and our time together ended abruptly. My work became increasingly challenging over the summer. Your mother and I struggled to find a balance in our home with the "new normal." When obstacles come your way and negativity surrounds you, there is a part of your brain that is going to tell you to get angry, to quit and to start over. My lesson to you: Adversity is a better fuel than an extinguisher. Take all of your anger, sadness, worry and doubt and turn it into something positive. Change the status quo. Ask anyone who has quit something because it was too hard and they'll tell you about the regret that they have to live with. Ask anyone who has pushed forward (even if they later failed) and they'll tell you about a lesson they learned and how it made them a better person.

Work harder than everyone around you. I have a weekly schedule and routine that I follow to a fault. With time being a constraint, I have to be efficient in all of my activities and everything I do has a purpose with no time being wasted, whether work, training or at home. Success for me takes work. I want to be the best husband, father, employee and triathlete that I can be and I don't ever want to feel like I could have given more. My lesson to you: Never finish a race with gas in your tank. Whether that race is helping out at home, working to close a transaction or a competitive athletic event, make sure you work harder (and smarter) than everyone around you. Not only will it make you better, but others will follow to keep up. As my great-grandmother used to say, "just do your best; that's all a mule can do."

Choose to be humble over prideful. Through racing locally over the past 3 years, writing a blog and being a part of a couple multi-sport teams, people talk to me about training and racing. I field a lot of questions and give out a lot of advice (hope it's all good). My real job is also consultative in nature and I advise management teams on how to improve their processes. My unique position comes with a choice: to build people up or break them down. My lesson to you: Never take your knowledge or success and use it to make someone feel like it is unattainable for them. Pride comes before a fall. Remember where you came from and how hard you worked to get to where you are, and inspire others to do the same.

Lastly and least important, I did a quick recap of my racing since my first race and built the attached table:

Looking back over the last three years, I can see marked improvements in every facet of my life. I am happier and healthier. I feel like I am a better husband now that I am a father. I learned to train smarter vs. training harder. I stopped taking work so personally and just try to show up everyday, work hard and do my best. My last lesson to you would be to find something that makes you happy and do it well. Then use it to inspire others to do well.


Kelly/Dad
Hebrews 12:1

Wind in the sails

"You cannot direct the wind, but you can change your sails."






It seems like ages since my last blog post, not for lack of content or inspiration, primarily because of time. This year is now 1/4 of the way completed and I wonder where the time goes...Over the last three months, my focus has been primarily on family. We sold our home (thank God) in 48 hours, are completing the build of our new home (hopefully at the end of this month) and have invaded my in-laws' for the interim as we wait to transition. The wind has changed our course from what was once a fast-paced inner city life focusing on happy hours, the newest dining experience and anti-commuting, to a life focused solely on preparing a suburban nest for Jack's arrival. I was, now admittedly, afraid of the changes and still find myself wondering if we made the right choices. But every time I see Emily's belly and feel the little dude kicking, I know we are right where we need to be.






Injury was the topic of discussion over the holidays and through the last couple of months. As of this writing, I can confidently say that I have never felt better about where I am mentally and physically. I still have the minor aches and pains that anyone would get from the volume of training that we do, but my hip is pain-free and has gradually improved back to where I feel normal again. I have learned a lot about control and managing expectations throughout this whole process and am almost glad I went through it. Almost.






One benefit to our current (and future) living arrangement is that I have changed training grounds, effort and schedule. Jamie and I are now able to train 4-5 times per week during the lunch hour(s) which has been mutually beneficial (at least for me). The club we are members of offers spin, an indoor track, free weights and most importantly, amenities to allow for clean-up and return to work. Why didn't we think of this when we were training for IM? Change the sails.




I focused all of my efforts over the off-season on strength training, primarily in my legs and shoulders. After the half-marathon in January, I resumed my efforts to triathlon. The focus has been, quite simply, speed. We run intervals at 5min/mi paces. We do high velocity spin workouts. We focus on heart rate and extending the race pace. I wish I could insert something in here about swimming, but this has ultimately been neglected and will return to focus this weekend....






The hard work has paid off.






I competed in my first race of the year on March 29: the No Label Brewery triathlon in Katy. I had no expectations for the race, other than to see how far I could push, and was expecting a crowd of 200 people who just wanted to workout for a bit and then drink beer the rest of the day. When I racked my bike in the open-rack T1, I saw three rows full of decked-out carbon machines and the owners were not who I was expecting. In fact, I immediately spotted a group of athletes that we raced against all of last year. Contrary to my vision for the race, the organizer had been able to attract a field of 400 athletes, a dozen or so whom either raced elite last year or got extremely close. I turned in a 1:04 which was good enough to earn 3rd place in my age group and a trip to the podium (11th overall). The swim was slower than normal, but I'll blame it on being caught up in the snake lanes. My bike was average (had a wheel rubbing my brake for the first 5 miles) and the run was great at a 5:57min/mi pace. The most exciting thing about this race is that it counts towards my elite status qualification since I finished within 10% of the overall winner's time (under 5% actually).



I opted for the double-header and ran the Run for the Rose 5k the next morning to support a cause that was dear to Jamie after the loss of a childhood friend to brain cancer. Jamie had set out to win the race and I was going to be towed around the course, however, the triathlon on the day before took some fuel from my tank and I couldn't run on his heels the entire race. Jamie absolutely crushed this run and went on to place 2nd in our age group and earned a top 10 overall spot in the race. The hard work has paid off for him as well...I was able to kick my legs to a 6th place in age group and 13th overall, averaging 6:24min/mi.






I look back on the past couple of years and realize how much I have changed for the better as a person, and I continue to attribute this to the drive and determination to improve athletically. I have goals and can see them met with hard work. My mind is clear and my body feels great. Obstacles have become challenges both professionally and personally. For me, tomorrow is always a new opportunity to prove something to myself.






I tell people all the time, if you don't like something about your situation, change it. Don't settle for the status quo. When the wind blows, change your sails.

A lookback of 2013 and my 2014 list

"So much of our time is preparation, so much is routine, and so much retrospect, that the path of each man's genius contracts itself to a very few hours."

What a year 2013 turned out to be...it's hard to believe that so many things fit into such a small 365 day window and that there was any time left to simply breathe, let alone exhibit any form of genius. Emerson said it best.

Preparation
2013 began with Emily and I preparing: We prepared for our fifth year of marriage. We prepared to grow our family. We prepared, as is obvious from this blog, for ironman. Along the way there were many things that went according to plan, like completing IMTX and qualifying for USAT Nationals, growing the relationship with Emily as we attempted to get pregnant and purchasing a new home to fit our anticipated larger family. There were also things that did not, such as losing our first pregnancy and having hip surgery. As is with anything in life, the preparation has paid off. As we embark on 2014, we have an 18-week old baby boy doing summersaults in Emily's belly, the foundation has been poured for our new home in the burbs and we are all (2+1+2 dogs) healthy.

Routine
Three words: work, work and work. I am currently responsible for the financial operations of twelve small-cap E&P companies located in Texas, New Mexico and the Gulf of Mexico. Work is routine and is not my passion, but I understand it and think I might be pretty good at it, however I definitely prefer to be outdoors in the sun. I am a perpetual attendee of conference calls, budget meetings and board meetings. After typing this, I can understand why I am so active outside of the office....

Retrospect
In retrospect to 2013, I have learned that Emily and I are resilient people. I could blame this on extreme hard-headedness but I'd rather (and truly) believe that we are, quite simply, tough. Our personalities feed on challenge. I look back at all we have endured individually and as a couple and it amazes me at how much stronger we are now than we were 5 years ago. We both approach life as an endurance event, taking what it gives us and moving forward faster than we were at the last hurdle. I am proud of us.

Genius
Genius for me were those moments when I pushed myself until I felt like I could not take another step, but I moved one foot in front of the other and kept moving forward. The applications of this principle are vast and reach so much further than athletic accomplishments. I view the world differently now. The people who told you growing up that you could accomplish anything you set your mind to were absolutely correct, whether or not they meant it or you believed it at the time. The world is full of people who are either too afraid to try or quit too soon. The genius for me is knowing that I will never be a part of this group.

My 2014 List

1. I will wake up everyday and accomplish something that positively affects the world I live in.
2. I will make a conscious effort to forgive no matter how badly I am hurt.
3. I will give more than I receive. 
4. I will choose my words (and tone) more wisely.
5. I will follow God's commandments.
6. I will pray everyday.
7. I will be thankful for my plight, understanding that somewhere out there, someone's predicament is worse.
8. I will do something active everyday.
9. I will be more conscious of the way I treat my body, aka, I will stretch more.
10. I will call old friends once a month.
11. I will complete another ironman this year.
12. I will learn to embrace traffic, and again, choose my words more wisely.
13. I will watch less TV and read more books.
14. I will learn to be a father.
15. I will travel somewhere new and experience a new culture.
16. I will #keepmovingforward

Kelly